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Stephen Jackson is trill.  If you have no idea what that means, pick up any of Bun B’s last three albums, hit up Urban Dictionary, or simply consider everything you know about Stephen Jackson, because he personifies trill.  One might even go as far as to say Stephen Jackson, whose Twitter handle is @DaTrillStak5, is the trillest of the trill… although there are certainly more than a few rappers who would vehemently dispute such a claim.

Unlike Stephen Jackson, skinny jeans are not trill.  Neither are Tyson Chandler and Amare Stoudemire, apparently, which is why Stephen Jackson doesn’t hang out with them.

Shots fired!

All I can think about now is the brief period of time during which Stephen Jackson and Tyson Chandler were teammates.  Did the two have any discussions about being trill?  Did the stark contrast in their respective levels of trill cause a rift in the locker room?  Did Larry Brown ever figure out what the hell trill even means?

If only I was trill enough to hang with Stephen Jackson…

He’s yet to celebrate his 20th birthday, but Anthony Davis has already put together a remarkable resume.  With an NCAA Title, an Olympic Gold Medal, a Nike endorsement contract, a clever trademark, and an NBA deal under his belt, it’s pretty easy to understand why the first overall pick of the 2012 draft “feels like Superman.”

I suppose it would also be pretty easy to understand why the young man would consider himself an NBA player… but Davis, despite his impressive list of accomplishments, isn’t willing to go there just yet.  Not until he pumps a bit more iron, and suits up for an actual game in what he likes to call the “grown man’s league.”  From the AP, via Yahoo (click the link to read the entire story, or scroll down for the excerpts I’ve selected)…

With training camp opening next Tuesday, Davis stopped by the Saints’ training headquarters, which is now in the process of becoming the headquarters for the Hornets under new owner Tom Benson.

Davis brought his gold medal with him, and acknowledged his experience playing for the U.S. at the London Games should put him ahead of the NBA rookie curve.

…

Davis said he has already added weight to the 220-pound build he had while winning a national title with Kentucky last spring.

”I’m not sure how much. Just feel it,” Davis said, cracking a playful grin. ”Feel like I’m Superman.”

…

”I just feel like a guy who’s just playing basketball right now,” the Hornets rookie and top overall draft choice said. ”Until I play an NBA game, then I (can’t) consider myself an NBA player.”

…

”It’s a physical game. Very physical. I definitely got to stay in the weight room.”

…

Being a top overall pick generally brings with it pressure to perform right away, but Davis said he is not worried about that, partly because of Williams’ philosophy that the job of young players is to learn and develop, not carry the team.

”Coach Williams does a great job of taking that pressure off of me and putting it on the team and organization,” Davis said. ”We’re all young guys. I’m 19 years old going into a grown man’s league. I think he does a great job taking that pressure off of one player, not just me. Eric, Austin, Robin, everybody on the team and just trying to put it on the organization and team as one.”

Starting four days from now, Anthony Davis will face the biggest challenge of his basketball career.  Based on these recent comments, it seems that his head is in the right place.  While the defensive end—where Davis really thrives—is a tough place to adjust to the NBA, I think athleticism and instinct alone will help him make immediate contributions for Monty Williams’ Hornets.  Eric Gordon, who will be the focal point of the offense, is a fantastic play maker and will be sure to help bring Davis along as well.

You can catch Davis’s first preseason game on Sunday, October 7th, when New Orleans hosts Orlando (2:30 Eastern is the time, and NBAtv is the place).  As confident as he appears, I imagine that Davis is relieved to know he’ll be the only Superman in attendance.

As you know, the Orlando Magic are an… evolving team.  Having recently replaced the NBA’s top center with a bunch of spare parts, the franchise is currently suffering through an inevitable shortage of morale.  In order to restore enthusiasm to its former level, the team will need to make a strong effort to show the fans that things are moving in a positive direction.

So, on Tuesday, the Magic unveiled their newest marketing campaign: “WE WILL.”  These two words of inspiration will serve as the team’s slogan over the course of the coming season, and possibly beyond.  According to NBA.COM, the message is built upon “the organization’s history of success and resiliency through the years,” and sets a positive tone in a manner that is “concise, yet bold and aggressive.”

Okay, I suppose that’s all well and good… but “WE WILL” implies a good deal of promise, doesn’t it?  And let’s be honest here… what do the Magic REALLY figure to do?

WE WILL…

…Start Big Baby at the five.
…Battle tooth and nail for the 4th spot in the Southeast Division.
…Not be able to fill our new arena.
…Try like hell to trade Hedo Turkoglu.
…Have JJ Redick on the All-Star ballot.
…Win more games than the ’11/12 Bobcats.
…Keep shooting lots of threes.
…Make sixth men and defensive specialists into primary offensive options.
…Give Josh McRoberts bobbleheads to the first 10,000 fans in attendance.
…Not be forced to deal with Dwight Howard’s shenanigans.

Hey, maybe it won’t be such a bad season after all!

Now, in all seriousness; it’s going to take more than a little inspired rhetoric to bring about a recovery following the departure of Dwight Howard… which, considering what Orlando was able to yield in trade, may as well have occurred via free agency.  Amidst a league dominated by select superpowers, reality suggests that there’s a lengthy rebuild ahead for the Magic, which brings me to question the immediate promise implied by the implementation of this slogan.

WE WILL… eventually… maybe.

^That would’ve been a more honest execution of the basic idea.

Starting 5: Stephen Jackson’s rap career is one of the best things ever, mostly because it constantly places him in front of a microphone.  In his latest radio interview, the ever-amusing Jackson divulges a whole bunch of sensitive information regarding his relationships, his thoughts on other NBA players-turned-rappers, and his offseason workout habits (or lack thereof).

The Basketball Jones: Dirk Nowitzki wants to send Delonte West to outer space.  That would probably be even better than the time he went to KFC.

NBA.COM: The Bobcats have a new brand identity: TougherFasterStronger. I was going to make a joke, but nothing I can come up with is as funny as the actual press release.

Sports Illustrated: Marquis Daniels will be taking his tattoos to Wisconsin.  The Bucks are in hopes that he’ll bring his talents, too.

Operation Sports: NBA 2K13, where Al-Farouq Aminu is better than Gordon Hayward, Jimmer Fredette is better than Kyle Korver, and DeSagana Diop isn’t the worst player in the history of the sport.  Man, I don’t get video games.

Celtics Life: Jason Terry is The Terminator.

Ball Don’t Lie: The Thunder Sonics aren’t moving back to Seattle, but a new arena deal could help the Emerald City land a different team.  It’ll probably take forever, but that’s okay, because when forever arrives we’ll have the technology to resurrect a young Shawn Kemp.

ESPN: Turns out Zaza Pachulia is quite the well-rounded individual.  He owns a restaurant, a hotel, and spends his free time studying at Harvard Business School.  He also gives fashion pointers at NBA.com.

News9.com: At the Oklahoma City Zoo, there lives a little red panda.  It’s named after Kevin Durant.

DIME: Yours truly has become an occasional contributor over at Dime Magazine.  Be sure to read my articles there throughout the coming season.

About two months ago, Kyrie Irving threw a bad pass intended for rookie teammate Tyler Zeller.  After watching it sail out of bounds, the NBA’s reigning Rookie of the Year angrily slapped a padded wall… and broke his right hand.  Tough break for a remarkable young man who had been busy turning heads as a member of the USA Select Team, but nothing that would keep him from getting better.

How, you ask, does a basketball player get better without the use of his right hand?  Well, if he’s Kyrie Irving, he simply spends more time working with his other hand.  Via Yahoo…

Irving improved his left-hand dribbling skills while he was sidelined, but he couldn’t do much with his right hand.

“I couldn’t tie my shoes,” Irving said. “I couldn’t put my belt on. There were a few things I couldn’t do. I couldn’t cook, open up juice. I had my best friend and my father with me all the time.”

The excerpt above is but a minor detail from Marc J. Spears’ latest story about Irving, who recently returned to five-on-five play, but it really stood out to me for a couple of reasons.

Firstly, Kyrie Irving is a baller.  Ballers find ways to improve, even when one of their hands is broken.

Secondly, the thought of Kyrie Irving with an improved left hand… that’s comparable the thought of LeBron James with five more inches on his vertical.  I mean, Irving had already established himself as one of the league’s elite ball handlers… and now he’s back having done nothing but work on his off hand for two months?

From a defender’s perspective, this has got to be utterly terrifying.

See you in a couple weeks, Kyrie.  I can’t wait!

You last saw Rasheed Wallace in June of 2010.  He was 35 then, and admittedly out of shape.  Presently, Sheed is 38, two full seasons removed from NBA basketball, and working out with the New York Knicks.  Wait, what?

According to ESPN’s Ric Bucher, Rasheed worked out with Knickerbocker veterans Marcus Camby and Kurt Thomas on Saturday, and the team is “considering” its options. Other free agents recently linked to the Knicks include Tracy McGrady and Kenyon Martin, but neither of the two are said to be seeking the veteran’s minimum.

So, does this leave New York with a need for ‘Sheed?  Word on the street is that they’re after a defensive specialist, and Wallace once fit the bill.  RotoWorld.com reports that the all-time leader in technical fouls “is not in very good shape,” but with a full training camp and preseason coming up, maybe the Knicks feel that they can work him back into form.  After all, he would be just the fourth-oldest player on the roster.

Now, in all seriousness: As happy as I’d be to see a favorite figure from my childhood back in the league, I’m not exactly convinced that this is good idea.  When I said Rasheed “once fit the bill,” I meant like six or seven years ago, not during his stint with the Celtics.  While I’ve always argued that ‘Sheed really stepped up in that seventh game of the Finals, I’m also forced to admit that he fired nearly four threes a night whilst connecting at a mere 28.3% clip over the course of his entire tenure.  There’s no denying that the man had become a certified gunner, and an ineffective one at that.

Unfortunately, I do not believe the Knicks have a need for ‘Sheed.  Fortunately, I do believe that this won’t prevent them from signing him.  We’ll just have to wait and see what happens.

Here’s something you may not have noticed: there were two Wrights on the Golden State Warriors last season.  First, there was Dorell… the three-point specialist who has since been moved to Philly.  And then there was Chris, who averaged 2.9 PPG whilst playing primarily in lopsided contests.

If this is something you already happened to know, it stands to figure that you fall into one of the following categories: A) You are a hardcore Warriors fan, or B) You watched a nationally-televised contest between Golden State and San Antonio on April 26th, 2012.  Since exactly 76 people watched this game—a season finale that Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili, Tony Parker, Stephen Jackson, Kawhi Leonard, and Gary Neal observed from the sidelines—it’s probably not likely that a lot of folks outside of the Bay Area have any recollection of Chris Wright’s 25-point outburst, during which he dunked the ball seven different times.

And that, my friends, is half the reason why I bring it to your attention today.  The other half?  Wright has been signed to a non-guaranteed contract by the Toronto Raptors, who will offer him an opportunity to show his stuff during training camp.

Some say you’re only as good as your last game.  If we are to apply this logic to the case of Chris Wright, then it would appear that the Raptors have just discovered their own Blake Griffin.  I think I’d argue that his spectacular 48-minute explosion was heavily influenced by a variety of unusual circumstances, but hey, I’ve been wrong before.

waf·fle [wof-uhl]

-verb
1: to fail to make up one’s mind: Joseph had been waffling over where to go.
2: what Dwight Howard does when forced to make tough decisions.
Origin: An unrealistic desire to be loved by all.
-Synonyms
flip-flop, waver, yo-yo

bull·doz·er [bool-doh-zer]

-noun
1: a large, powerful tractor having a vertical blade at the front end for moving earth, tree stumps, rocks, etc.
2: Nikola Pekovic.
Origin: Montenegro
-Synonyms
intimidator, oppressor, brute

cork·screw [kawrk-skroo]

-adjective
1: resembling a corkscrew; helical; spiral.
2: Marcus Camby’s jumper.
Origin: Typically, the top of the key.
-Synonyms
twist, turn, spiral

stream·lined [streem-lahynd]

-adjective
1. having a contour designed to offer the least possible resistance to a current of air, water, etc.; optimally shaped for motion or conductivity.
2. Al Harrington’s head.
Origin: Exact cause unknown.
-Synonyms
sleek, contoured, aerodynamic

mov·ing [moo-ving]

-adjective
1. capable of or having movement: a moving object.
2. describes every single screen that Kevin Garnett has ever set.
Origin: The Garnett School Of Defensive Technique
-Synonyms
illegal

When it comes to a vehicle, it takes something awfully stunning to stand out amongst the young multimillionaires that make up the NBA.   That’s probably why T-Wolves’ tweener Derrick Williams outfitted his matte-black Dodge Challenger with color-matched Forgiato wheels and custom details both inside and out.  Yes, it’s a beautiful machine indeed, and it’s got as much bite as it has bark.

Being that this is the souped-up, SRT8 version of the Dodge Challenger, Williams’ whip is packing a punch of approximately 470 horsepower.  According to TopSpeed.com, that’ll propel the young ball player from 0-60 in just over 4 seconds, and all the way to 182 MPH if he’s willing to wait just a few moments longer.

So basically… don’t try to race Derrick Williams, because you will lose.  Also, try not to mistake him for Batman.  That wouldn’t sit well with Danny Granger.

Official –Swag-O-Meter– Rating:

5/5

Wanna have a car like that of Derrick Williams?  Here’s where you go.  Now all you have to do is acquire an NBA paycheck.  In the meantime, you may as well look at a few more photos, all courtesy of @LuxuryMotoring.