NBA 24/7 365

Some will probably label me a weirdo.  I choose to consider myself an artist.  I think it’s a fine line (remember the dude who chopped his ear off?  He was a hell of an artist!).  I’m certainly not the first to try and create an NBA masterpiece with MS Paint, but I think I’ve brought an original approach to the game.  Most attempts that I’ve seen in the past have taken a more… abstract approach.  I tried some realism.

LeBron James dunks on Kevin Garnett (’08 Playoffs)

Stromile Swift posterizes Yao Ming (2005)

Shawn Kemp teabags Dennis Rodman (’96 Finals)

Yes, Insidehoops forum members, I did steal your idea for this post.  There you go, I’ve given you credit.

So, what does everyone think of my work?  Good, no good, or a waste of time?  Also, if you want to create an MS Paint masterpiece of your own, e-mail it to admin@nba247365.com.  If it’s cool I might post it for you.

The best game of my second-favorite playoff series ever.  Kobe Bryant scored 50 points in a losing effort as Tim Thomas hit his famous pair of huge three-pointers; first the one to put the game into OT, and then the dagger from the baseline with about two minutes to play in the extra period.  You may recall that TT was sent home by the Chicago Bulls after appearing in just three games at the start of the season.  The Suns picked him up in an attempt to help fill the void left by the absence of the injured Amare Stoudemire.  Thomas ended up providing everything they’d hoped for and more throughout the team’s exciting run that came to an end just two wins shy of a Finals appearance.  Phoenix had no post presence whatsoever and ran a rotation that really only went seven players deep.  The closest thing they had to a PF or C was either Thomas or Boris Diaw.  Steve Nash ran the show and the rest of the guys spaced the floor and put up points in a hurry (Phoenix averaged 107 a game in the ’06 postseason).

Throughout the series, the Lakers had been pounding the ball into the paint with Lamar Odom and KWAMAY BROWN, who was playing the best basketball of his life.  Despite being much less talented than the Suns (Luke Walton was starting at SF), the Lakers were able to take advantage of Phoenix’s lack of size and jump out to a surprising 3-1 lead.  Kobe Bryant, who averaged a career-high 35.4 PPG that season, was yet to reach 30 points in the series.  Coming off of a blowout loss in game five, he decided it was time to take matters into his own hands.  Raja Bell was suspended for this game after clotheslining Bryant in the previous one, so it was a prime opportunity for the Mamba to go off.  If Odom boxes out and/or Bryant makes that airball during the final 10 seconds of regulation, then Kobe gets it done and the Lakers advance to play the Clippers in a battle of LA.

I remember being so damn torn… I’d become Tim Thomas’s #1 fan and I absolutely loved watching the Suns run up and down the floor, but I also wanted to see that fight for Staples Center bragging rights.  I recall simply hoping for great games and dramatic finishes.  Game six certainly delivered.

Box Score

Unfortunately, Kobe mailed it in as LA was trounced in game seven.  I get a kick out of the fact that no one ever brings that up.  I mean, wasn’t this supposed to be Kobe’s “MJ” moment?  I know Lamar Odom is no Scottie Pippen and Kwame Brown is no Dennis Rodman, but this was exactly what Kobe asked for when he and Snaq filed for divorce.  Probably not even MJ could’ve carried that squad to a title, but he certainly wouldn’t have taken three shots in the second half to make his teammates look bad.  That–and that Kobe bit off a lot more than he could chew–is all I’m saying.

Lots of NBA players drive European cars, but only one drives a Renault Scenic… with his name on the side.  Feast your eyes on the 100-something horsepower, part-leather upholstered, “compact MPV” that Ty Lawson will be steering during his time in Europe…

This vehicle was apparently given to Lawson by the Lithuanian club he’ll be playing for until the NBA gets their sh!t together.  I’m sure the thought of receiving a free car seemed like a nice perk to the young man.  After all, he’s only collected about two or three million dollars in his career thus far.  That’s certainly enough to provide one with a more-than-comfortable lifestyle, but not so much that free sh!t isn’t cool anymore.  I can imagine how disappointed he must’ve been upon finding out that his complimentary ride would be a brown hatchback.  It doesn’t really get any less cool than that.  The fact that they plastered his name on the side just makes it worse, too.  If someone forced me to drive around in that thing I’d at least want to be able to do it incognito.

Official –Swag-O-Meter– Rating:

2/5

It’s so damn goofy that he almost pulls it off on some this is clearly so uncool that it’s funny swag… almost.  Thank god for that opt-out clause.

This is completely off topic, but remember when LeBron won MVP in ’09 and they gave him a Kia?  That still cracks me up.

It’s nothin’ like the $91 million deal he’s been cashing in on over the past seven years, but hey, 2.65 mil for about five months of service is a hell of a lot better than nothing–which is what NBA players are making at the moment.  Via the Denver Post…

Longtime Nuggets forward Kenyon Martin will sign a contract to play with Xingiang Guanghui in the Chinese Basketball Association.

Martin’s contract will be the the biggest in CBA history.

“It’s a great opportunity for him to stay in shape and stay fresh,” said Andy Miller, Martin’s agent. “And it also gives him an opportunity to expand his name globally.”

It’s an exciting career opportunity for Martin, an unrestricted free agent, who won’t have an out-clause in his contract. The CBA ends on Feb. 16, but Martin’s team is talented and could make a playoff run toward the end of March.

I’ve read reports that the Chinese club will also pay Martin’s agent fees, so it’s more like a $3 million dollar deal.  That’s not to say that K-Mart needs the money–that seems highly unlikely.  I figure he must’ve signed this thing because he simply wants to play some basketball.  Depending on which way you choose to look at it, I suppose it makes sense.  At the age of 33 (closer to 34), he’s at the point where the otherworldly athleticism he’s always leaned fairly heavily upon will begin to fade away.  Unfortunately, I think the decline has already begun.  K-Mart didn’t seem to appear in the highlights nearly as often last season as he did in the previous one.  So, since there’s no promise of an NBA season, maybe he just wants to be sure that he doesn’t miss any basketball during the waning years of his professional career.  On the other hand, all the same sh!t I just mentioned kind of makes you wonder why he took the deal… I mean, assuming there is some sort of NBA season, Kenyon has chosen to sacrifice one of his last couple years.  He’ll be going on 35 entering the 2011/12 season… it’s only gonna get harder for him to find a long-term contract.  Anyway, who the hell knows what his reasoning was.  I hope he dunks on lots of heads and joins up with a contender for the stretch run that I pray will exist.  It looks like the Flying Tigers are one of the CBA’s top teams (remember Quincy Douby?  He plays for ‘em), though, so the whole stretch run plan might not pan out.

K-Mart has been a favorite player of mine for a long time, so I can’t wait to see some highlights!  Watching him unleash his fury on a bunch of stoic Asian dudes will be hilarious.

I think I’m responsible for creating the only NBA blog that’s never compiled some sort of “best mixes on Youtube” list.  For that reason, I’m never going to make one.  However, I will share with you my top 10 NBA-related videos on Youtube.  The difference between a video and a mix: a mix features organized highlights with music and a theme.  A video is… anything.  Some of the videos on my list will be mixes, and others will not.  What I promise you is that all of them are worth your time.

Note: List does not include funny videos.  I’ll do that another time.

Honorable Mentions: Art Of War and Soul Of The Game.

The top two videos on everyone’s list.  I’m try’na be a little different over here.  So, moving right along…

#10: Stromile Swift Stage 9 (thekurtman31)

I don’t normally like whatever kind of music that is, but it’s a perfect fit with Stro’s highlights.  The creator also did an excellent job of syncing the video with the song.  The fact that it features Stromile Swift puts it over the top.

#9: Kblaze’s F@ck Fundamentals series (kblaze888555)

The version above is the only one left on the ‘tube; the bastards eliminated Blaze’s original channel due to some NFL copyright nonsense. Deleting a database of KBlaze mixes should be some sort of federal offense punishable by death. Seriously.

#8: Charles Barkley and Shawn Kemp- Ultimate Tribute (3434TheTruth3434)

This video more than lives up to the “Ultimate Tribute” tag.  It’s jam packed with emotion… mostly anger… at both the rim and inferior defenders.

#7: Old School dunks mix (wetagua)

Like the Kemp and Barkley video, but with a classic rap tune and a little Larry Johnson in the mix.

#6: LeBron scores 16 points in 2 minutes (TheNBAUK)

“MAKE ‘EM CRY UNCLE!  LLLLLLLLLL- TRAAAAAAAAAAAIN!!!!! OHOHOHOHO LLLLL-TRAAAAAAAAAAAIN!!!!” -Austin Carr

#5: Shai- Ricky Davis (DBAL23)

This has been a favorite of mine for a very, very long time.  Young Ricky D was SWAG personified.  The classic 2Pac track is a perfect match with his game.  If Shai had included the facial expression that followed the dunk a 2:10, this would be #1.

#4: KBlaze- Mark Jackson (kblaze888555)

I can’t honestly say that I’ve ever seen another mix where the music fits the player’s game quite like it does in this one.  Jackson’s confident, free-wheeling style is a perfect match with Jeezy’s arrogant rhymes.  Flawless execution by the one and only KBlaze.  Amazing ball handling from Mark Jackson, too.

#3: Vince Carter’s top 100 dunks (vincecarter)

The greatest dunker in the history of the game doing what he does best… 100 times.  Complete with the original commentary on each play.

#2: Shawn Kemp’s top 10 dunks (gangstamoogle)

This is my favorite top 1o video of any kind that’s ever been compiled.  The fact that Kevin Calabro called Sonics games throughout the Shawn Kemp era makes me wish I grew up in the ’90s (I guess I did, kind of, but I was too young to get it).  I used to enjoy listening to Calabro elaborate on dunks by Chris Wilcox.  Weezy was cool, but Shawn Kemp was one of the greatest ever to throw down!  I definitely missed out.

#1: Court Cuts best of the 2000s (BigWillDawg)

A four-minute reel of classics from my favorite era ever featuring the original commentary on each play.  It doesn’t get any better than this.

In 2003, Carmelo Anthony entered the NBA as a cornrow-sporting, Jordan-Brand-endorsing, silky-smooth rookie out of Syracuse.  What I refer to as the NBA’s hip-hop era (c. 1996-2008) was near it’s climax…  Allen Iverson was still every kid’s favorite player, Sebastian Telfair was still gonna be the man, and AND1 was still the sh!t.  With a street-influenced fashion sense and a nickname as cool as his game, Carmelo’s timing couldn’t have been better; he instantly became a bearer of the torch.  The youngin’ from the mean streets of Baltimore had all the talent to go along with the image.  He got his own line of sneakers and clothing, he quickly added to his tattoo collection, and he made sure his fitted always had that perfect tilt.  He was in DUB magazine, he was on CRIBS, and he hooked up with the hot girl from MTV.  Basically, he was doin’ it.

Indeed, Melo was one of the most prominent posterchildren of the latter part of the most swagged-out era in NBA history.  During a few short years (that had the potential to be epic had anyone given a flying f@ck about defense), he even teamed up with the OG, Allen Iverson.  Their attempts to out-offense the opposition proved to be futile in the postseason, but it was a fun ride (albeit a frustrating one for anyone who actually gave a crap about Denver’s success) that epitomized the era’s glorification of style and occasional disregard of substance.  As the duo was separated in ’08, things began to change, though.

I suppose you could say the NBA is still in it’s hip-hop era.  I mean, at the moment, rap music and basketball are tied together as tightly as ever.  However, this has to be considered a new hip-hop era.  No, the game of basketball hasn’t changed a whole lot since 2008.  Hip-hop certainly has, though.  Unfortunately, the Kanye-West-driven hipster movement has caught on like wildfire and taken over the genre.  As a result, both the music and the fashion have become… pussified, for lack of a better word.  Due to the close ties between music and basketball, it’s all rubbed off on the NBA… and Carmelo Anthony is exhibit A.

A few days ago I came across the following photo of the Melo Man lookin’ like a fruitcake at some fashion event which I didn’t care to learn more about.

Red pants?  Green shoes?  It’s September, not Christmas.  And what the f@ck are those stupid-ass glasses?  That’s not to mention that the whole look simply appears forced.  It doesn’t look natural on the dude.  He looks uncomfortable in his own skin.

JB needs to do a remake of that commercial with Melo lookin’ like he does in the red-pants photo.  Have one of the dudes at the 20-second mark get up off the stoop and slap the hell out of him for lookin’ like such a clown in a public place.

Official –Swag-O-Meter– Rating:

1/5

You’re better than this, Melo.  This isn’t you!  Yeah, I know you’ve grown up and moved to The Big Apple, but all you’ve gotta do is put on a suit!  Suits maintain your swag while boosting your apparent sophistication.  Red pants and a Sherlock-Holmes-looking jacket just make you look like a dumbass.

I know what you’re thinking (reader, that is.  I’m done talking to Melo)… what the hell do I care what another man wears?  Well, I guess it’s just a little sad to me, because Carmelo Anthony was a trend (a trend that I grew up on).  Now he’s nothing but another follower of a trend.  A really lame trend that needs to go away.  Everybody’s trying too hard these days… dudes need to go back to being who they are.  SWAG is supposed to come naturally and radiate effortlessly from those who truly possess it.  The term swag is being used now more than ever, but as far as swag goes, the NBA peaked about 10 years ago.  Carmelo and his red pants are a prime example of its dwindling presence in the league.

I miss those days… the music and the game almost seemed to come together as one… like Method Man could’ve been the one slammin’ and Melo could’ve been the one rhymin’.   Create a Carmelo mix with a gritty 90′s tune nowadays?  It wouldn’t even seem right.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few weeks, I’m sure you’re well aware of all the rumors regarding JR Smith and a possible CBA deal.  I’m sure you’re also well aware that the professional basketball world has revolved around rumors about which NBA player will sign where… and that most of these rumors remain, well, nothing but rumors.  That doesn’t appear to be the case with JR Smith, though.  According to Adrian Wojnarowski’s Twitter, Young Money will be spending the winter playing for Zhejiang Wanma of the Chinese Basketball Association (remember, CBA contracts do not come with escape clauses).  Tweeted Woj:

Denver free agent J.R. Smith has signed a one-year contract with Zhejiang Wanma of China Basketball Association, source tells Y! Sports.

Wojnarowski has always been a reliable source of NBA information, so there’s no reason to doubt the legitimacy of his tweet.  You may recall that I included JR in my article about the six players I’d most like to see in the CBA.  Well sh!t, we’re 1/6th of the way there!

This story just broke, so that’s all the info I’ve got right now.  If I remember correctly, the speculative articles had JR making about 3 million bucks.  Don’t quote me on that, though.

Final note: looks like JR’s gonna be teaming up with former New Jersey Net Josh Boone (according to Zhejiang’s roster page on asia-basket.com).  Interesting.  I’m saying JR does 35 PPG… at least.  He’ll post a game of 60 or more, too.  Guaransheed.

Oh, Kobe Bryant also scored 56 points in three quarters.  Stro added 12 boards and a pair of swats to his aforementioned 22 big ones in this duel for the ages…

Before you move on to part three, be sure to pay attention at the 2:05 mark–clear the rest of those tabs, you shouldn’t be looking at that anyway–because that’s where Stromile Swift gets a nice back pick from Rodney Buford and pounds a lob from Shane Battier directly on top of Mark Madsen’s dome.

Unfortunately, the uploader of these videos must have decided that Stromile’s final 10 points weren’t important enough to warrant the inclusion of the fourth quarter, because it’s nowhere to be found.  The Lakers ended up winning by 39.  It appears that Mark Madsen and Slava Medvedenko (who’s full name is apparently Stanislav–lol) must have been putting in work down the stretch (combined for 17 points, 9 boards, and 3 blocks).

Fun fact: Kobe attempted another 30 shots in LA’s next game, but only managed to score 29 points.  Stromile Swift, on the other hand, was more efficient in his next outing.  He dropped 12 on 9 shot attempts.  Just sayin’.