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Uh, I watch basketball, so I already knew Paul George is a terrific athlete, you dumbass!

Yeah, you knew he was a terrific athlete… but you had no idea the dude can do this:

…did you?  Because I didn’t.  The only dude I ever see doing that is Air Up There from the Mixtape Tour.  Speaking of Air Up There, I’d like to share a true, but possibly slightly exaggerated story from five or six years ago.  I may have told you this before… if so, well, read it again.

I used to attend the Mixtape Tour every time it came to Boston, and I got to see Mr. 720 do his thing live… he did some crazy sh!t in the game, but the freakiest thing he did came before anyone even entered the building.  They were having this dunk contest for locals to see who would be granted a spot on the team that would be torn apart by the AND1 guys.  What I learned from said contest: Bostonians can’t dunk for sh!t.  Anyway, Duke Tango called Air Up There out of the Tour Bus and asked him to show the locals how to dunk a basketball.  With no warmup, and cargo shorts/casual kicks on his legs and feet, he busted out that 360 between the legs with a goddamn dusty rubber ball… first try.  I’m not even 100% sure that his shoes were tied.

Anyway… Paul George should consider throwing his name into the dunk contest hat if he’s got anything else on the 360-between-the-legs level up his sleeve.  He probably still wouldn’t win unless he showed up with some sort of exotic animal, or maybe the holy grail as a prop, but it appears that he could entertain… and that’s the point.  A fan vote to determine the winner of the dunk contest?  Bogus.  Fans can’t do anything right.

On a related note, can we get Nick Young in the next dunk contest, too?  Thanks.

I came across this little story on Insidehoops.com, and after seeking out a more detailed article from the Toronto Sun, I guess I just felt the need to share it with whatever readers I have left during these hot, locked-out days of summer.

TORONTO - Leo Rautins, the head coach of the Canadian men’s basketball team, gets so frustrated talking about Matt Bonner that he’s almost at a loss for words. And that’s saying quite a bit.

Rautins is, after all, a professional commentator.

The fact Bonner, a former member of the Toronto Raptors and current forward with the San Antonio Spurs, has been unsuccessful in procuring his Canadian citizenship, despite getting the ball rolling back in 2008, upsets Rautins to no end.

“It’s very frustrating,” the head coach said on Tuesday, after a Team Canada practice at Ryerson University. “I see a lot of Canadians who are less Canadian than Matt Bonner. His daughter’s Canadian. His wife’s Canadian. His grandfather’s Canadian. He’s got a home here. When he’s not playing for the San Antonio Spurs, he’s here (in Toronto).”

The main stumbling block seems to be the fact that Bonner, a native of Concord, N.H., spends most of the year in the United States. But he has no choice. He plays for San Antonio. Rautins said Canada Basketball has tried to make that point to the federal immigration ministry, but to no avail.

“Trust me, we’ve tried everything,” said Rautins. “I feel bad for Matt. I don’t know if there’s anybody who wants to play more (for Canada) than he does.”

Still, Rautins is optimistic that Bonner’s citizenship will come through in time for the Red Rocket to help Canada qualify for the 2012 London Olympics. There are two qualifying tournaments left for Canada, later this summer in Argentina, and next year at a still unnamed location.

First of all, I LOL’d… if you didn’t, well, I’m sorry I wasted three minutes of your day because I don’t really have a whole helluvalot of insight to add to this here story.

Secondly, WTF, Canada?  So, Bonner plays for the Spurs, but he still reps Canada to the fullest with his nickname, “The Red Rocket.”  Bonner picked up the moniker while playing for the Craptors from ’04-’06.  Rather than driving a vehicle of his own, Bonner would often ride the public trains around T-dot.  These trains are supposedly as red as his hair, and they say somethin’ like “ride the rocket!” on the sides.

If that doesn’t make a dude Canadian, I don’t know what does.  Forget the the fact that he has Canadian family members and stays there in the offseason… that should simply make it a no-brainer.

Hello internet… it’s been a while.  Seriously, I think it’s been a few days since I turned on a computer, let alone posted anything on here.  So, I figure it’s time to throw my opinion out there on a  noteworthy happening: my main man Sonny Weems will be leaving the NBA for at least a season (if there is one) to play a little overseas ball.  He’s already signed a one-year deal in Lithuania.  Via the USA Today…

NEW YORK — Sonny Weems has joined Zalgiris Kaunas of Lithuania, signing a contract that will keep him in Europe all season rather than risk sitting out an entire year if the NBA lockout lasts. Roger Montgomery, Weems’ agent, said his client signed the deal Thursday without an NBA opt-out clause because he believes the league’s uncertain labor situation makes it “in our best interest to unpack our bags and stay the entire year.”

 Weems played last season for Toronto and was a restricted free agent. The Raptors extended a qualifying offer, meaning they would maintain the right to match any offer by another team if he returned to the NBA.

 Montgomery says Weems could play 70 games next season between the Lithuanian and Euroleague schedules, a good opportunity for a young player instead of losing the entire year if the NBA and players don’t reach a deal. He didn’t disclose the value of the contract.

 Montgomery started looking for opportunities for his players at the urging of the union, which had been telling agents to be prepared for a long work stoppage. He quickly found a match in the Lithuanian champs, a team he described as needing “one little boost to get over that hump” and believes the swingman is that player.

 ”Sonny will be able to go in and make a true impact,” Montgomery said, helping a team “really in the middle of the pack maybe go to the top of the pack.”

 Weems, who turned 25 Friday, is not the quality of Deron Williams, who Thursday was nearing a deal to join Besiktas of Turkey in September if the lockout remains. But Montgomery said Weems was the first from the NBA to agree to the deal without the option to return once the lockout ends.

 That could be a while and Montgomery wasn’t willing to wait.

 ”There’s no way I’m going sit by idly and wait for David Stern to decide if he wants to be fair,” Montgomery said.

 Weems averaged 9.2 points in 59 games for the Raptors last season. Because he is not currently under NBA contract, he is free to make the jump without worry of FIBA approval.

 Well, assuming there is an NBA season, I’m obviously disappointed because Sonny is one of my favorite players.  However, I suppose this makes sense for both he and the Toronto Raptors. 

First of all, Weems didn’t exactly have the season that I’m sure both he and the Craptors had hoped for in 2010/11.  He was held back to just 59 appearances due to injuries, and 28 starts due to a logjam that includes fellow young gun DeMaR DeRoZan, Linas Kleiza, and the enigma that is James Johnson.  Kleiza is a known commodity, and is probably a better player than Weems right now.  DeMaR DeRoZaN has the most potential of the bunch.  James Johnson actually managed to show a little somethin’… enough to warrant minutes.  Weems kind of got lost in the shuffle, and he won’t make progress riding the pine.  He’s still a cheap, talented, young athlete with lots of potential, though, so the Craptors don’t want to lose him.  Here’s why this works for them: Weems is a restricted free agent.  If and when he decides to make a return to the NBA, the Craptors will have the right to match any offer sent his way.  It works for Sonny because he gets a sure thing in his Euro contract (no lockout there), and he’ll be out of the logjam situation in Toronto.  I’m sure both parties are hoping for an improved offensive game and a return to the league next season.  The main thing that Sonny needs to improve is his jumpshot.  He was only able to connect about 28 percent of the time from long-range last season on his one attempt per game.  At 6’4, he needs more range.  This should serve as a good opportunity to work on that jumper.  The line is a little closer, and I’m sure he’ll get his opportunities. 

I have no idea how much Sonny is set to make, by the way.  I can’t find an article that discloses the amount of the contract.  I figure he’ll get paid fairly well, though.  I’m no expert on Lithuanian basketball, but I figure he’ll have to be one of the better players over there, right?  I don’t recognize any of the other names on his team.  Anyway, he was on a small contract in the NBA, so I’m sure this is a significant payday for him.

Good luck, Sonny!  I’m hoping for total domination!

My main man!  He’s done it!  With another nine points in game six (a 105-95 Dallas victory), and a Finals average of six points on 52 percent from downtown, DeShawn stepped up and earned himself his first NBA Championship ring.  It was about the only way a man with the SWAG of DeShawn Stevenson could possibly style on ‘em any harder, and with his three-finger hand signal now complete with a little jewelry, I figure this puts him near the top of the all-time SWAG rankings.  He will never live up to the hype (one of those NBA draft sites billed him as the next Michael Jordan), and he’s most definitely a little off his rocker, but when it comes to somewhat unwarranted levels of sheer confidence and lack of give-a-sh!t, not many have ever done it quite like the one and only DeShawn Stevenson.

He hit his next two, too… and you best believe he was struttin’ like some sort of peacock…

Yup, he was feelin’ it last night… feelin’ damn good, he was.  And can you blame the man?  The poor guy has had a pretty rough life, and he’s made something of himself, so he’s just out there making the most of it, not givin’ a sh!t.  You gotta love it!  For those of you who have never heard the DeShawn Stevenson story, check this out real quick.  Courtesy of Wikipedia:

DeShawn Stevenson was born in Fresno, California to Genice Popps and Darryl C. Stevenson. A year after DeShawn’s birth, Darryl Stevenson was hospitalized for threatening family members, allegedly attacking his brother with a butcher knife. Stevenson’s parents never married, although when the boy was 3, his father signed a court order agreeing he had a duty to support his son. Two months after being released from a Fresno County mental health facility, Darryl Stevenson held up a gas station with an accomplice who held a knife to a woman’s throat. Darryl was found incompetent to stand trial and wound up in Atascadero State Hospital. Psychiatrists diagnosed him as a paranoid schizophrenic. He eventually was placed on probation, but arrested again for kidnapping a woman in 1985 and jailed in April 1986. In 1993, when Stevenson was 12, his father Darryl murdered his own mother, Clara, by strangling her. Darryl Stevenson died in Corcoran State Prison of lung cancer at age 36 in 1999. Tattooed on his chest was one word: “DeShawn.”

No matter how much of a tool you think he is, come on, you can’t help but feel happy for the guy.  The same can be said for Jason Terry, Dirk Nowitzki, Jason Kidd, etc.  I’m not the biggest Jason Terry fan in the world–you may recall that I called him a “chump” after he talked a bunch of super-lame smack midseason–but he was a key member of that Mavs team which suffered the devestating Finals loss to Wade’s Heat squad back in ’06, and he was also there for the Golden State debacle in ’07.  He can put that behind him now, and keep his tattoo! 

Jason Kidd has been the main man on two Finals losers… a pair of teams which never really had a chance, seeing as they would’ve had to defeat what was arguably the most dominant NBA team of all-time.  At 38 years old, with the window closing fast, he was able to win a title without doing it the way a lot of 38-year-olds are forced to do it–by joining an already established contender as a bench player.  Kidd has been the focus of some criticism in the past.  After the Mavs suffered a few early exits from the postseason, people speculated that maybe the Mavs would’ve been better off keeping Devin Harris’s flopping ass.  So much for that… Kidd hit a variety of big-time triples throughout these playoffs, and his leadership has been talked about by his teammates as one of the key factors in all of the comebacks they had to make to get to this point.  Said Kidd upon winning the title: “I can’t believe the journey. The journey, the character of my teammates telling me they wanted to get me a championship. Tonight they came out and played well. I came here twice, this being my third time so third time was the lucky charm.”

As for Dirk Nowitzki, he’s the easiest to he happy for.  The guy is such a hard worker, and he’s had an incredible NBA career which only lacked the title that he acheived last night.  He’s often been blamed for being the main cause of the heartache his Mavs teams have suffered over the years.  He’s received such labels as “soft”, “choke-artist”, etc, when a lot of the blame was probably unfairly placed.  Dirk has been one of the best players in the NBA for years, and now, by defeating a group that consists of a two-time MVP, a Finals MVP, and a former franchise player, he has cemented himself as one of the greatest ever to do it.  The Mavs are a good team, but let’s not act like he had a whole lot of help.  Although he dropped a game-high 27 last night, Jason Terry had his share of struggles in this series.  JJ Berea was pretty good last night, but he sucked for the first, what, four games?  Aside from those two the Mavs don’t really have any other scoring threats.  Dirk had to carry this team on his back down the stretch in most Maverick victories this postseason.  Some of his shooting displays were absolutely incredible… the dude just makes shots that are simply unguardable.  Off of one foot, falling away, hand in the face (hell, hand on the wrist in sime cases)… doesn’t matter, he made those shots… over, and over, and over again.  He made ‘em because he works hard.  The dude hits the gym and practices these shots that no one else has ever practiced.  Big-time props to Dirk Nowitzki on silencing the critics, a group which used to include myself.

I can’t seem to find any noteworthy quotes from the Finals MVP… maybe that’s because he was too busy partying to do any talking.  An $80K bottle of champaign?  Goddamn son, that is winning.

So, you know the Mavs won, and you know how I feel about it… should I say a little something about how they won?  I’m sure you all saw it yourselves, it was game seven of the NBA f@ckin’ Finals, but I’ll toss you a few bullet points anyway.

• Dirk Nowitzki went 1-12 in the first half, but the Mavs still led.  How?  The rest of the team shot 65 percent.  Jason Terry was lighting it up, and DeShawn Stevenson had already nailed all three of his triples.  Dallas’s 32 first-quarter points were the most scored in any period of the series.
• Not only did the Mavs out-shoot the Heat from the field, they edged them out on the offensive glass, 10-9.  It doesn’t seem like much of an advantage, but keep in mind that they shot three percent better than Miami and played with the lead down the stretch.  They came up with some key offensive boards that burned a ton of time late in the fourth, preventing any Heat run.
• Miami kinda sucked.  They turned the ball over 16 times (only 20 assists).  They clunked 13 of 33 freethrows.  Dwyane Wade missed all four of his three-point tries as he went 6-16, and LBJ turned the ball over six times. 

LeBron James… you will probably hear more about him than the damn Champions, so I’m just going to leave it at this: he led Miami with 21 points, but he wasn’t nearly aggressive enough down the stretch… again.  He passed up a ton of open shots (in the third quarter particularly), and he quite honestly didn’t play with a whole lot of hunger.  He played as if the Heat’s destiny was already set in stone.  Maybe that’s because he thinks it was: “The Greater Man upstairs know when it’s my time. Right now isn’t the time.”

All I have to say to that is… come on son.  Get the f@ck outta here with that bullsh!t.  You didn’t play well, your team didn’t play well, so you and your team lost.  No “greater man” had a damn thing to do with this.  It’s all on you; well, you and your teammates.  Let’s not forget that Dwyane Wade didn’t do a damn thing last night either.  LBJ will take all the heat (no pun intended), but where was Pookie?  He didn’t really attempt to activate any kind of beast-mode down the stretch himself.  Miami looked dead last night.  They played like they’d already lost, basically…  at least that’s how it appeared to me.

I can’t take credit for making that, but I nearly died of laughter upon seeing it this morning.  Thank you to Patrick Chewing of the Insidehoops forums for that one.

So, congratulations to DeShawn Stevenson, Dirk Nowitzki, and the Dallas Mavs.  As for LeBron and the Heat… it’s gonna be a long offseason.  I do believe they’re going to win multiple titles at some point, but as of right now they’ve failed… and that’s all anyone’s gonna want to talk about for the next couple weeks… if not months.

This will be my final recap post until next fall.  I’m looking forward to the vacation.  I love doing this, but I need to charge up… my battery is definitely running low.  I’ll still post throughout the offseason, but not on a daily basis… so, that’ll do it!  The 2010/11 NBA season is a wrap!  Apparently Summer League has been scrapped due to a potential lockout, so, uh… well, enjoy the warm weather!

I’m just going to forewarn you: this post is pretty much about LeBron James.  I’ll leave it up to you to click the X if you’ve already heard enough about the guy this week.

“This is a big game, probably the biggest game of my life, well, not probably, it is. And I’m approaching it that way.” -LeBron James prior to game five.

Yes, he had a triple double.  No, I didn’t think he played very well, and I certainly didn’t feel like he played as if it was “the biggest game of [his] life.”  With Dwyane Wade visibly hobbled by a sore hip and the Mavericks playing like the offensive juggernaut we saw in the first three rounds, the Heat needed some points–or something–from James down the stretch.  Not only did he fail to provide them, but he didn’t even appear to have a burning desire to provide them.  I like LeBron James, and I think he took waaaay too much sh!t for clunking a few late-game shots during the regular season, but even I have to admit that he really dropped the ball here.  Down three with six minutes to go, LBJ assisted on a D-Wade bucket.  His team was within one, and it was anybody’s game… but Miami needed this LeBron…

…in order to take advantage an opportunity to head back to Miami with a 3-2 lead that would’ve all but ensured an NBA title.  Instead, they got this LeBron…

2 points, 1-3, 0 rebounds, 0 assists, 1 TO

And the two points were scored when it was all but decided, too.  Miami had this series tied up at 2-2 with nine total fourth-quarter points from LBJ entering last night’s game.  They could’ve used some more production from LeBron down the stretch of a couple games, but they were still in a pretty good position without it.  In game five, though, they NEEDED LeBron.  Like I said, Dwyane Wade was hobbled by a banged-up hip, and Chris Bosh is… Chris Bosh–a great player, but not a guy who’s going to out-do Dirk Nowitzki in crunch time.  This was LeBron’s cue, but he never got the memo, apparently.  He did take two shots in the final three minutes–each one for the lead–but that was hardly enough, and not what I would like to have seen from the guy.  He was called for a charge on his only aggressive rack attack (that play came between the two jumpers)… so, I don’t know, I guess he tried to make a little something happen… but he didn’t really appear hungry to rip this crucial game from the clutches of the Mavs… which is a tad unsettling.  I kind of figured he’d come out in beast-mode for this one after the whole game-four debacle, but I guess all the hype either doesn’t motivate him or completely destroys him… one or the other (Says my main man DeShawn Stevenson: “Different guys are different. [word?] Kobe Bryant feeds off stuff like that. He looks for it every time. LeBron’s a different kind of person. Obviously he’s a freak of nature, able to do a lot of things, but everybody in this league is built different.”)

Or maybe I’m just reading too much into this and he simply didn’t play all that well down the stretch in a big-time L, I don’t f@ckin’ know.  It’s hard to figure with this dude.  I’m not saying he’s going to be able to be the guy from game five of the Boston series every night–that was an incredible display that will be remembered forever if Miami comes back and wins this title–but couldn’t (and shouldn’t) he at least try to be that guy in this type of situation?  I mean, it would be one thing if D-Wade was feelin’ it, or if some sort of other plan was working… but he wasn’t, and it wasn’t.  Basically, Lebron’s number was dialed, and he didn’t pick up the phone.

The good news?  Even with this damaging loss (you know the story; series tied 2-2, the winner of game five wins whatever percentage of the time… it’s high), all the Heat need to do is win two games at home.  LeBron shows up big and helps the Heat achieve a comeback?  It’s quite possibly the craziest story in the history of NBA basketball, and no one gives a flying f@ck about what LeBron did in game five… or four… or any other game of this entire season, aside from the ones where he delivered.  I’m not saying that that’s how it should be, but that’s how it is.  So, LeBron still has a chance to essentially send all of this stuff I just typed straight to the recycle bin… but this is his final opportunity to do so, and it’s looking like an awfully daunting task at this point.

Looks like the Mavs could have me eating some serious crow, eh?  I believe the word I used to describe their fate a few days ago was “toast.”  While I’m not writing Miami off, you’ve got to figure that Dallas would have to choke it a little bit to lose now.  They haven’t exactly been known to choke throughout these playoffs.  You know Dirk can taste it right now… and you know he’s hungry.  I wouldn’t be surprised to see an absolutely MONSTROUS game out of the dude coming up here.  He dropped another 29 last night in a rather routine performance.  He didn’t have to play hero down the stretch because JJ Berea finally showed up (17 points), J-Kidd hit a huge three (13 points), and Jason Terry was excellent (21 points).  It was Terry who hit the dagger from about a yard beyond the three-point line…

I’m not gonna give LeBron any trouble for that.  What can you do?  Dallas was making those shots in this game.  They hadn’t been able to do so in the first four, so I guess they were due.  Miami better hope they don’t make ‘em in games six or seven (if there is one).

Fun fact: this is the first time Miami has dropped back-to-back games in the 2011 playoffs.

Fun fact: Dallas finished up the third quarter with DeShawn Stevenson, Brian Cardinal, and Ian Mahinmi on the floor… and they won.

Fun fact: Mario Chalmers gave Miami 13 first-half points… and they lost.

“………a free shirt, you say……….”

I took me a while to find a suitable picture for this post, but I learned something interesting in the process.  Did you know that when you Google image search “NBA,” a picture of Tyrus Thomas losing the dunk contest pops up just six lines down?  There’s also a photo of Jeff McInnis shooting a J over Brendan Haywood if you scroll down a few lines further.  Jeff McInnis and Tyrus Thomas; faces of the league, for sure.

Ok, here’s how this is going to work: get 10 of your friends, enemies, family members, co-workers, acquaintances, husbands, wives, cousins, whatever–I don’t really care who they are–to “like” NBA247365.COM’s Facebook page, and I’ll send you a free shirt.  There will be five shirts given away (all five of them size XL), so the first five people to get the job done earn themselves a shirt.

Be sure to instruct the people you refer to e-mail me at admin@nba247365.com and list you as the person who sent them.  If they don’t e-mail me, I won’t have any way of knowing who referred them, so I won’t be able to add them to your tally.

I feel like this should be really easy… I mean, who isn’t going to come into contact with 10 people within the next few hours?  In this day and age of electronic communication you could probably earn yourself a free t-shirt in 15 minutes or so.

You know you want one!  …I hope.

Dirk Nowitzki did his best impersonation of a flu-striken Michael Jordan and dropped 21 points while battling a 100-degree temperature in a tight 86-83 Dallas W.  Nowitzki went through a 16-minute drought in the first half, but–as always–he came up huge for his team down the stretch.

Before I get this post rolling, let me just say that I have played basketball with the flu.  I figure some of my readers have probably tried it as well.  It’s f@cking difficult, isn’t it?  I recall having a hard time getting the ball to the rim from the highschool three-point line.  I was simply drained of all of my energy, and that rendered me pretty much useless… and I wasn’t exactly playing against NBA-level competition, either.  So, while Dirk came up with his lowest point total of the series (21 on sub-50% shooting), all things taken into consideration, he was still the MVP.  D-Wade did drop 32 on 13-20, and Dirk’s lack of energy was exploited a little bit by Chris Bosh (24/6 on 9-19), but who was the man when it was all on the line?  Dirk was.

The start of this game must’ve had Rick Carlisle seeing flashbacks of game one.  Miami sputtered out of the gate and shot a lowly 29 percent in the first quarter, but they came up with nine offensive boards.  All tied up at 21 with the Heat shooting 29 percent?  Not a good sign for Dallas, although I suppose the 29-percent shooting they forced had to please coach Carlisle seeing as he decided to bench the team’s best defender.  That’s correct, Rick Carlisle thought it would be a good idea to start Jose Juan motherf@cking Berea over my main man DeShawn Stevenson.  Stevenson responded by coming in off the bench with 1:42 in the first and providing his Mavericks with a much-needed 11-point first-half effort.

JJ Berea?  He only scored eight points in the entire game.  Send the bobblehead back to the bench, Rick.

All sarcasm/DeShawn bias/toolishness aside, I understand why Carlisle gave Berea the start.  The one thing the Mavericks have been unable to do is build an early lead in this series.  In their first win and in this win, they had to fight back.  Fighting back typically requires a few fortunate bounces, twists, or turns, so it’s an awfully difficult way to go about things.  I’m sure Rick was just trying to get his team off to a more promising start at the offensive end, which is important and understandable.  However… unfortunately for the Mavs, Jose hasn’t been unable to do much of anything throughout this entire series.  He actually managed to get to the rim on a few occasions last night, but he blew some layups that he quite honestly just needed to make.  The fact that DeShawn Stevenson, of all people, was able to pitch in 11 off the bench ended up being extremely important because the offensive spark (Berea) didn’t end up providing any spark at all.

Even with Stevenson’s surprising offensive production, the Mavs trailed by two at the half.  Dirk hadn’t hit a shot since the five-somethin’ mark, and Dwyane Wade was looking like the same dude that carried Miami home in game three.  So, as I felt at the end of the first, I felt at the end of the second: Miami was going to win this game.

Unlike games two and three, the third quarter did not begin with a big Miami run.  Dallas managed to score the first points of the period and took a two-point lead on a JJ Berea J (I feel like I just typed an entire sentence by holding down on the “J” key.  JJJJJJJJJJJJ).  I actually missed the first half of this quarter because I decided to take a little car ride at halftime… and I got kind of carried away.  Please forgive me, I made a purchase yesterday and I have to be honest–I was more excited about it than I was about the NBA finals.

Where I get money for this? Don’t think rhyming blogging.

Not at all.

Seriously, not at all.  I just received four months’ worth of payments for advertising revenue; guess how much?  ………….$15.42.  Eight cents more and I might be able to eek out a quarter tank and a Fudge Round, but that’s about it.  One thing’s for certain: writing about the NBA for an audience of a hundred or so people a day does not pay well, and if you aren’t totally insane like I am, it’s probably not a field you want to enter into.  So, what I need you to do is tell your friends about your favorite blog, NBA247365.COM!  Tell ‘em it’s great, tell ‘em it’s cool, tell ‘em it sucks so bad it’s funny… I don’t really care, just tell ‘em to visit often!

Back to the third quarter… this is the part where Tyson Chandler and Shawn Marion scored 13 of 20 Dallas points.  They scrapped their way to a few putback opportunities, and got some run-outs for layups.  Shawn and Tyson finished up with a combined 29 points, which came up especially huge with Dirk’s illness, Peja’s absense (played two seconds, litterally), and J-Kidd’s masonry (0-3, 0 points).  Still, even with the surprising offensive contributions from defensive-minded guys, Dallas trailed by four entering the fourth.

The fourth quarter of this game was… interesting, to say the least.  After Miami’s brief seven-point lead disappeared after a 14-4 Dallas run, no team led by more than four points, and it was a one-possession game pretty much all the way down the stretch.  That meant that each team was shooting for a tie or a lead on nearly every posession, which made it a rather exciting finish.  It was a prolonged one, too, because neither team could actually put the ball through the hoop.  There were two baskets made in the final five minutes of this game.  Two.  Yes, this entire series has been a defensive battle… but this had more to do with guys missing than guys being locked down.  Mike Miller was out there clunking open threes, guys were getting offensive boards and missing the putbacks; hell, even Dirk missed a pair of back-to-back three-point tries.  He did not, however, miss this driving layup that he squeaked in between Udonis Haslem and a flying Dwyane Wade (seriously, he was inches from two-handedly obliterating that shot) for the game’s second-to-last basket…

Those were only 2 of his 10 fourth-quarter points, by the way.  As a team, Dallas was able to score 21 in the final quarter while holding Miami to just 14.  How’d they do it?  Well, for one, Jason Terry was able to get a little something going this time around.  You may recall that LeBron made a massive difference in game three by completely removing Terry from the game in the fourth quarter.  JET dropped six points during Dallas’ 14-4 run, and scored a total of eight in the quarter.  So, he and Dirk had to come up with 18 of the 21.  See, that right there is the difference between the win in game four and the loss in game three.  Dallas doesn’t really have anyone but Nowitzki and Terry who is capable of creating buckets when sh!t gets tight down the stretch.  I suppose Berea can do a little of that, but not against the length and athleticism of Miami, apparently.  So, that was key #1, in my mind: Jason Terry was able to give Dirk that little bit of help he needs to close out a game.  Props to him for finding a way to get the job done after looking like a five-year-old trying to score on his father in the previous game.  Key #2?  Dallas’ zone D.  They played it throughout the fourth, and while Miami missed some good looks, the zone did seem to lead to a little discombobulation and a handful of turnovers.  Miami was also unable to connect on a three-point try in the entire quarter.  Giving up the three is one of the risks you take when you go with a zone.  Dallas took that risk, and it worked out just swell because no one in a Miami uniform could fall out of a boat and hit water.

In sumnation (is that a word?  I feel like it is, but I’m too lazy to check): both teams clunked a lot of pretty damn good looks in this fourth quarter, but Dirk Nowitzki battled through his flu and balled like a champ for the final 12 minutes, and his helpers gave him just enough to get the job done.  The fourth quarter looked like a pick-up game at times; the ball was bouncing all over the place, dudes were running up and down the floor, rebounds were being tapped around… it was a bit ugly, honestly.  Let me just put it this way: this was a fitting way for the game to come to a close…

Aside from hardcore Dallas fans, can we all agree that we wanted Mike Miller’s shot to go in?  I wanted Dallas to win the game… but that would’ve been insane!  The ending I would’ve scripted for game four: Miller makes that shot, but DeShawn Stevenson comes in and saves the day with a game-winning buzzer-beater to cap the OT.  That ending would’ve been pure SWAG, and you know it.

Speaking of DeShawn Stevenson, my main mo’f@ckin’ man… if you haven’t heard, he publicly complimented LeBron and Wade’s talent a few days ago.  The issue?  He wasn’t talkin’ about their basketball talent…

“They’re great, great actors and they sell it.’ … Coach said it before the series we have a chance to push the ball like we like because [Wade] complains to the ref a lot. We’ve got to take advantage of that. They tend to do that and we’ve got to take full advantage of that … He does it all the time. He did it like seven times [Sunday].”

The King’s latest sales pitch:

LeBron… COME ON SON!  Look, LeBron… I like you, but that was terrible.  Like, you should be ashamed of that sh!t.  That’s all I’ve got to say about the matter.  As for your eight big ones on 3-11, well… I’m pretty sure Skip Brainless has that covered.

Thanks for the insight, Skipper.

One last comment before I wrap this up: who else thought Dwyane Wade’s rejection on Tyson Chandler’s attempted slam was going to be a turning point in this game?  This had “momentum builer” written all over it…

A little guy embarassing a big guy… a four-point swing… a play that took it from a one-possession game to a two-possession game… I thought for sure that this would spark a Miami run.  I guess that’s the difference between this Dallas squad and the ones of years past–this type of thing doesn’t kill them.  Tyson was right back down there trying to posterize Wade again just a few moments later.  It resulted in a foul the second time around, and if I remember correctly, Tyson added at least one more point towards Dallas’ winning effort.  Miami loss or not, though… that was a nasty block.  Tyson got owned kinda bad.

Did anyone else feel like last night’s contest was eerily similar to game two?  Yeah, the Mavs lost this time, but think about it: Miami was clearly playing better basketball–getting much better looks and locking everyone but Dirk down defensively–yet they still led by just five at the half.  Game two was actually tied at the break, but it was a similar story.  It seemed that Miami should’ve held a reasonably-sized lead.  Last night, it seemed as if the lead should’ve been larger than five.  Had Chris Bosh, the eventual hero, been able to make a few open jumpers and various finishes in traffic, the lead would’ve been much larger.

The second half had similarities as well.  Miami began the third quarter on an 8-0 run that started at the defensive end.  Joel Anthony actually managed to block a Dirk Nowitzki jumper.  That possession was followed by one of Shawn Marion’s many ugly shot attempts, and then came a turnover on a bad pass by Nowitzki.  Dallas shot themselves in the foot with 14 turnovers on the night… I suppose 14 really isn’t that many, but when you’re only shooting 40 percent from the field, taking care of the basketball becomes especially crucial.  Also, as I’ve stated in the past, you can’t go coughing the ball up against the Heat; they’ll turn your f@ck ups into slam dunks quicker than you can say “SH!T!“.  The Heat came up with eight steals on the night… Dallas takes a little better care of the ball?  They probably win this game.

Retaining possession wasn’t Dallas’ only problem on the offensive side of the ball.  Aside from Dirk Nowitzki, pretty much everyone in a white jersey had every problem under the sun.  LeBron James completely locked Jason Terry down in the fourth quarter… the guy was rendered completely useless.  By the time Terry got an open shot (would’ve put the Mavs in the lead with 58 seconds to go), he was visibly rattled and pulled the string on it.  JET went just 5-13 in the game and was unable to score a single point in the fourth.  Credit LeBron James for making a huge difference in the game with his lockdown D.  He only scored 17 points, but holding the Mavs only potent offensive threat not named Dirk Nowitzki scoreless in a tight fourth quarter is just as big a reason that Miami won this game as any.  Watch LeBron son this reporter who foolishly tried to make things out as if LBJ didn’t do sh!t down the stretch of this game…

I suppose he must’ve missed LBJ’s slip-n-slide, too.  It was a massive contribution that got Miami like 5,000 trick points closer to a gamebreaker.

No idea what the hell I’m talking about?  I feel bad for you, because your youth years were not as cool as mine.

Where was I… oh yeah; the Mavs’ offensive struggles.  Well, let’s just put it this way: only two Mavericks not named Dirk Nowitzki shot better than 38 percent from the field.  One of them was my main man DeShawn Stevenson, who went 1-1…

…and the other was Peja Stojakovic, who went 1-2.  They accounted for just five points.  Shawn Marion, who was HUGE in game two, went 4-12 (his eight misses included a blown dunk attempt that flew over the backboard and some of the funniest looking midrange hook shots that you’ll ever see).  Jose Juan Barea had one memorable finish to four three-point bricks, and Tyson Chandler failed to finish a few decent opportunities around the rim (I thought he was fouled a few times as he went 1-4, but LeBron was fouled on a few of his layups with no call, so whatever).  Brian Cardinal went stat-less in seven seconds.  Meanwhile, Miami was getting 18 combined big ones from Mario Chalmers and Udonis Haslem.  It turns out that three of Mario’s 12 shouldn’t have counted…

…yep, slow-mo replay proved that it should’ve been called a backcourt violation.  However, you can’t really be mad at the refs here; two thirds of his foot was in the frontcourt, and I mean, sh!t, I had no idea it was backcourt in live motion.  It’s an unfortunate twist due to the fact that the game was decided by two points, but I don’t want to hear anyone crying conspiracy or any of that sh!t.  Dallas had plenty of chances to win this game long after this missed call.  They turned the ball over, failed to get good looks at the basket, and Dirk finally missed a must-hit shot. 

Dirk did score 34 points in the game on 11-21, and he basically had this game tied up by himself with a minute to go.  Chris Bosh had just passed up an open jumper that resulted in a Miami shotclock violation, and like I said earlier on in the post, he hadn’t been able to hit a goddamn thing all night long… so I suppose he was due:

How ’bout that backhanded pass (right on the money!) from LBJ, and that completely illegal screen/NFL maneuver by Udonis Haslem?  I’m glad they didn’t call it, but I’m just saying… that isn’t legal in the first 47 minutes of an NBA Finals game, and it probably would’ve drawn a 10-yard flag from the pocket of Ed Hochuli.  Anyway, that bucket turned out to be the game winner.  Bosh made just 7 of 18 shots, but hey, he stepped up and nailed the one that put Miami’s stellar defensive effort over the top.  Give him credit for having the stones to shoot the ball just moments after passing up a good look, and give LeBron credit for making the right play out of the double-team.  Said LeBron James: “I don’t care if he missed 15 in a row. He was wide open and that’s his sweet spot. … It’s the trust we have in each other’s ability, no matter what the point of the game is at.”

Excellent call, LeBron.  I’m happy for you that Bosh made it, because if he hadn’t, all the morons would’ve been running around calling LeBron a pansy because he didn’t shoot the ball.  Whether Bosh makes that shot or not, this was the right play.  He’s an All-Star with a wide-open shot within his range.  That’s a good look.

So, even though James only scored 17 in this game, I liked the way he played.  He came out really agressively from the opening jump, as did D-Wade.  I think I heard they took something like one jumper combined in the entire first half.  Both of them were attacking the rack with fury, which shows in the points in the paint category (40-22, MIA).  LeBron did dish nine assists, and D-Wade took care of the scoring down the stretch with 29 points on the night.  Basically, what I’m saying is forget who had what; Miami got better shots than Dallas in this game.  That resulted in six extra makes and a huge road win. 

Is Dallas toast?  Sadly, I feel that they are.  It’s going to be hard watching Dirk Nowitzki go down… again… in what will likely be his final chance… after seeing him dominate throughout all four rounds (the dude is even denying dunks like he’s prime Bill Russell now).  Yes, I would consider his game last night pretty dominant… it’s just that the dude got ZERO help and missed one key shot.  He scored 34 points in a game where his team finished with 86.  According to my math, that’s 39.5 percent of his team’s offense.  Throw in 11 boards and 50+ percent shooting from the field against the league’s best defensive team… and throw in the fact that everyone in the arena knew he was going to have to shoot the ball throughout the entire game because no one else could get the job done… yeah, he was awesome.  I was surprised when he missed the one at the buzzer.  I actually said “it’s good” as it approached the hoop.  He created more than enough space for a clean release.  I suppose he had to miss one eventually… but the way he’d been rolling, it was hard to believe it finally happened.  Anyway, yeah, I think the Mavs are toast.  I’m going to say it happens in six.  Dirk isn’t going to be getting enough offensive help to win this series.  Miami will continue to keep everyone else on lockdown, and the sports world will go apesh!t as LeBron collects his first of what will likely become a couple fistfulls of rings.  Be prepared, because it’s happening, and there isn’t a damn thing your hateful ass can do about it.

“Hey, DeShawn, do you happen to know of a place where I can get this thing removed?”